


Serenity

by kivvyin



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Angels, Demons, Fluff and Angst, Immortality, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-06-04 00:21:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6633166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kivvyin/pseuds/kivvyin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not okay to be different. No matter what you've been told, deep down you know it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Serenity

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction. It spawned from an immortal!hinata dream I had, but I switched some things around. I hope you enjoy it! I'm not sure if I'll finish it or not but here's a preview.

Sometimes things get hard, that's normal. You learn to deal with it. You find ways of adapting your life around this obstacle. Maybe you don't do it the healthiest way, but it works. And that's all that matters. As long as you don't fail you'll be fine. Everything will work out okay if you breathe in, breathe out, and repeat. That's what we're told to do, so we do it.

* * *

 

"I don't want to do it." I sigh and tap my pencil on my desk. "I just don't understand it." By now it's two in the morning and I haven't made a mark on my sheet. I could do it, but I can't. It's confusing to explain. I don't have the will to do anything anymore. Lately, even volleyball seems like a chore. I keep messing up. Our quicks don't work as well as they used to. Hinata doesn't ask for tosses because I 'seem tired'. At first I thought it was a kind gesture. I was tired. Only for that day, though. After two straight weeks of using that excuse, I finally picked up on it. The one who's tired isn't me; it's Hinata. 

We started dating over a month ago. It was a stupid idea. I don't know why I thought it could work. I liked being with him as much as playing volleyball, and being able to do both at the same time was the best thing imaginable. I stuttered my confession. It wasn't my intention to confess anyway. I wasn't prepared. 

My phone lights up:  
From:HINATA  
Subject:R U UP?  
OI, BAKAYAMA? R U AWAKE?

I climb down from my thoughts.

To:HINATA  
Subject:NO  
NO, GO TO SLEEP.

As much as I appreciate his effort, it really isn't helping. Recently, I haven't been able to sleep. I try. I lay down, close my eyes, try to relax. But I can't. I get this weird feeling whenever I close my eyes. Blood rushes to my head, my fingers start to feel numb. It's like my body is rejecting sleep. I feel exhausted, but I can't do anything about it. My room is silent. It's dark all around me except from a shine of light from my lamp. Ow, ow, ow. That's the fourth headache I've had this hour. I need to sleep. Sighing, I get up from my chair and throw myself onto my bed. I can hear my phone going off, but I'm too lazy to get it. It's probably only Hinata. He's tired of me anyway, so why should I care. 

-

I'm not sure what's happening to me. Everything is blurry, patches of blue and gray flood my eyes. My head feels like it's spinning. I can't handle this. I can't focus on anything anymore. Despite my everlasting drowsiness, I haven't been able to sleep a wink again. I tried taking sleeping pills, warm milk, counting sheep, basically anything the internet told me. The lightheaded feeling should surely have put me out, or at least the whole bottle of medicine I took. My phone has been going off since this morning. It's currently 4 in the afternoon and everyone is worried. I haven't been to school in over a week. The team and coaches have shown concern, talking about practice and health. The amount of texts from the team don't even compare to the surplus from Hinata.  

From:HINATA   
Subject:?????   
Tobio? Where are you? Are you okay? Should I come over? 

I should be worried. Hinata never write properly, or calls me Tobio over text. My hands start to shake as a rush of energy courses through me. I bring my head into my hands and close my eyes. I begin to count. 1, 2, 3-my eyes start to tear-4-my nails begin to dig into my skin-5-there's a knock at the door. My heads spins to the direction the sound comes from. Involuntarily, I run to the door, slamming my hand to the handle. It stays there for a moment. I use that time to regain any calmness that I can. I count again. 1-my phone vibrates in the other room and it takes all my strength not to run to it-2, 3, 4, 5. That's all I need for now.  

"Kageyama?! Open the door!" The energy spark starts to form again, but I open the door anyway. "Finally! I thought I was going to have to break down the door, Bakayama." 

"Ha, like you cou-" My body freezes. Everything around me is spinning fast, except for Hinata. He's in slow motion. My eyes begin to tear again. I rush to wipe them away. Hinata reaches for my hand, slowly. I'm shaking. Why is he moving so slow? I hear voices coming from outside, but in the brief glimpses I see out the window, nobody's there. My hands start to feel numb, then I feel the numbness crawl up my arms, followed by my back, my legs, my feet. I feel paralyzed. I can't move. My body feels heavy, my head light. My eyes roll around, looking every-which-way. Fuzzy picture whirl past me. Hinata's hand finally meets mine. 

"T..o..b..i...o, yo..u're...ble..e..d..ing." His speech is slow and soft, almost incoherent. I look down at my hands. Blood drips from my fingers, falling slowly to the floor. I go to touch my face again. When I remove my hand, it's covered in a dark red liquid. I couldn't feel it. I can't feel anything. If I hadn't looked down, I would've never noticed Hinata's hand was still on mine. He moves his hand away quickly. The sudden movement sent a jolt of electricity through my entire body. I felt like I was on fire.  

I'm distracted again by a loud noise coming from in front of me. I jolt, my ears ringing, heart beating fast. As my eyes start to steady, I notice Hinata outside on his bike riding away. _No...don't go._  


End file.
